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Itachi by awesomebunnys

Stories by PoisnousPassion

Itachi And Kisame by Crystal-black-666


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Submitted on
April 8, 2007
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Everything about him was vicious. His fighting, his fucking, his eating... Itachi noticed the last one when Leader-sama had Hidan and Kakuzu plundered a supplies caravan that was heading to the Sunagakure, their loot winding up to be lots of water, food, and clothing. The clothing had been given to Deidara, who immediately tore up half of it, resculpted it into something fashionable, then sold everything for a grand donation to Leader-sama's cause.

Itachi was more interested in the water and food - mainly water. He was getting tired of refiltered water he had to force down with a teaspoon of sugar or a lump of lemon in his glass to cover the chemical taste.

The food, on the other hand, was enjoyed by all. Dinner was somewhat less of a havoc after Zetsu's initial claim to the living survivors Hidan had all-too cheerfully deposited at the schizo's doorstep. Even Leader-sama had made an appearance with his fellow shadowy companion at the table. Itachi had fallen into the dusty use of table manners, even going so far as to relax the Sharingan in the evening.

Kisame, on the other hand, showed a side of him that only Itachi knew in bed from him - no one else was allowed the luxury of knowing how painfully sweet those teeth were when they were in one's skin. Itachi smiled to himself as he silently, secretly, observed everyone at the table.

Deidara ate like a teenager, alternating between stuffing his face and talking. Kakuzu was meticulous about his food, separating peas from meat and potatoes from salad. Hidan was odd as ever, stabbing his food to a near unrecognizable mush before devouring it. Itachi found Tobi interesting, the way his fork disappeared beneath his mask and reappeared empty. It was... cute.

Kisame, though... he devoured. He did not eat, more to the effect of inhaled. Itachi set a cool eye to his shark-skinned friend, watching as Kisame payed no attention to any of Deidara's banter or even the sound of Hidan demanding there be more salt on the table. Kisame was apparently either very hungry or he just didn't think... Itachi felt a tremor of arousal meander through his body. Alright, he thought, this was rediculous.

No man right in his mind would get turned on watching someone eat.

Kisame didn't notice, though, thankfully, grunting quietly as he wolfed down an entire leg of chicken sans bone in about ten seconds. He was even eating greens tonight, Itachi noticed, watching leaves of lettuce, coins of cucumber, snips of carrot and dices of celery disappear into that serrated mouth.

He stayed away from the tomatoes, though. Itachi smiled, thinking of someone who was opposite - one who liked tomatoes.

"Nngh, 'tachi-san, plz p's teh pepper."

Snapping out of his trance, Itachi managed to regain some semblance of the refined ninja he was, reaching over and handing Kisame the pepper. Kisame gulped down whatever poor piece of meat he had been knawing on before smiling at his friend. Itachi's mouth twitched slightly, giving Kisame the barest of hidden smiles before it was covered in the action of enjoying a piece of sushi.

Itachi knew Kisame could eat pretty much anything pushed his way, as well as any of the other Akatsuki. Except one meal that Kisame savored only on his own and Itachi was proud to know just what it was.


Itachi himself.
I have no idea what brought this on. I think I was thinking about steak. Being stationed in a desolate place makes you think about all the good food you're missing and malnourishment that takes place.

But whatever. ItaKisa is sheer sharky love. ^_^

THEY'RE CALLED DERMAL DENTICLES!!

And Itachi will soon be having Kisame's baaaaaabies.

~@~
Kishimoto is the maaan
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:iconmizukichan00:
MizukiChan00 Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
soooo...awesome!!~
:iconstephencolbertomgplz:
Reply
:iconitachilover2000:
Itachilover2000 Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Very cute
Reply
:icondarkkitty2430:
Darkkitty2430 Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2012  Student General Artist
:iconmegustaplz:
Reply
:iconkisame-hoshigaki-666:
kisame-hoshigaki-666 Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2012
What if we don't want kids?
Reply
:iconlalunacatchadora:
LalunaCatchadora Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
love it
Reply
:iconkisamefanfromhell:
KisameFanFromHell Featured By Owner Feb 15, 2011
Aww Itachi-Sans drooling. :giggle:
Reply
:icondragonyouko:
DragonYouko Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2010
Nice job, I loved it and are you going to write anymore KISAita?
Reply
:iconsleepyoldvamp:
sleepyoldvamp Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2010
Thanks a lot for checking it out! And probably not, I haven't played in the fandom for quite a while. Maybe later though...
Reply
:iconmeggie5610:
Meggie5610 Featured By Owner Oct 5, 2010
lol if mah friend was to know i fav'd this she be like "whut da haaaiiil?"
lol :iconthankyouplz:
Reply
:iconsleepyoldvamp:
sleepyoldvamp Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2010
Fave it quietly xD
Reply
:iconmeggie5610:
Meggie5610 Featured By Owner Oct 9, 2010
indeed :iconderpplz:
Reply
:iconpeaceandzebras97:
PeaceandZebras97 Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2010
AWESOME!
Reply
:iconsleepyoldvamp:
sleepyoldvamp Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2010
glad you enjoyed! :D
Reply
:iconambivalentsoul:
ambivalentsoul Featured By Owner May 4, 2010
I love it, the teeth part kind of gave me the giggles. I'd love to read more on your take of their relationship. (ItaKisa ftw!) And it's very Itachi, to just sit back and observe. "T/_\T" Hee.
Reply
:iconirishkisame007:
irishkisame007 Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
DEIDARA SENPAI, YOUR ALIVE!?
*tackles*
Reply
:iconariaasacura:
AriaAsacura Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2010
Im hungry now :3
Reply
:iconqueen-rai606:
Queen-Rai606 Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2009
steak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*drools over both the itakisa and the steak author's note*
Reply
:icondespairedpheonix:
DespairedPheonix Featured By Owner May 7, 2009  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
XD I'd be eating like Diedara :X I liked it a lot. I really enjoy the Kisame Itachi pairing, although highly unlikely, I think it's still really cute ^.^
Reply
:iconmasterinsanity:
MasterInsanity Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2009  Professional Writer
I eat like a shark crossed with a dog.Inhaleing everything on my plate then swollowing it all whole.My mom keeps telling me "There's this magical new invention called a fork.Use it"I simply shrug and keep nhaleing everything within reach.
Reply
:icon143gaara-kun:
143Gaara-kun Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2009
haha this is really nice yaoi
Reply
:iconrenvalentine:
RenValentine Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Oh very sexy! I'm aroused now, thank you. Love this pairing.
Reply
:iconisho13:
Isho13 Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
I would be eating like Kakuzu, my brother like Deidara, my sister like Hidan and my cousins like Kisame XD
Reply
:iconomg-world-domination:
i would be eating like Deidara most the time, (how old is he anyway?) and if im really hungry i eat like kisame, if im pissed i eat like hidan.
Reply
:iconisho13:
Isho13 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
even if i'm hungry i can't eat like kisame. I mean, he eats like a shark @_@

I'm more like a kitty o.o
Reply
:iconomg-world-domination:
omg-world-domination Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2009
hai hai to that! go kittys! i always has a bell on. so im often calld kitty.
Reply
:iconisho13:
Isho13 Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
My friends say i'm like a kitty, but my school partners say i look like a spider O.o

Long ago, a friend of mine saw a spider (a very big one) and she thought it was a cat -_-Uuuuuuu
Reply
:iconomg-world-domination:
omg-world-domination Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2009
sSERIOUSLY? that'sfunny.
Reply
:icondeideiishot:
deideiishot Featured By Owner Oct 8, 2008  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah.... Who likes tomatos, I hate them.....
Tomatos........ Eeeewwww......
Reply
:iconslykm:
SLYKM Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2008  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I found this story hillarious...I have recently thought about what Itachi and Kisame's child would look like, (if it was possible for two guys to get one).
Reply
:iconomg-world-domination:
NUUUU! i KNOW itachi-CHAN is a girl! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Reply
:iconslykm:
SLYKM Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Yea sure...o.0
Reply
:iconomg-world-domination:
omg-world-domination Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2009
:D i'm sorry, i'm really, really, weird. ^^;
Reply
:iconslykm:
SLYKM Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
oh its fine, I am too, actually. XD
Reply
:iconomg-world-domination:
omg-world-domination Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2009
what is your DA name mean?
Reply
:iconslykm:
SLYKM Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
oh well since you asked, SLY comes from a penname i had on a different site. It was an abbriviation of it. K is for Kisame and M is for Marvin. XD
Reply
:iconomg-world-domination:
oh. lawl. who's youre avvie?
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconshaypericulae:
ShayPericulae Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2008  Hobbyist Writer
Aw, I thought it was cute! :+fav:
Reply
:iconakaikenu:
AkaiKenu Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2008   Traditional Artist
oh puh-lease, like ITACHI would ever be gay! but still, amusing story... about Kisame...eating
Reply
:icongauged-butterfly:
Gauged-Butterfly Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2008
I love KisaIta, so cute!! This was very well written.
Reply
:iconsasu-naru-luver:
sasu-naru-luver Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2008  Hobbyist Writer
this is the last yaoi im reading today because if i eat anymore any1 who makes me mad ima go ninja on ther *** (i don't wanna say it so i put stars * instead)
Reply
:iconhunter-chan:
hunter-chan Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2008  Hobbyist Writer
kyaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!
>///<
kawaii!!!!!!!
awwww...Tobi's cute! ^^
Reply
:iconvampirerika:
VampireRika Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2008
it was written well,but one thing.........MUST YOU MAKE THEM FREAKIN' GAY!!!!God you people are turds......
Reply
:iconsleepyoldvamp:
sleepyoldvamp Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2008
I feel that there is a difference between the writings of the fan community who pair up characters out of canon relationships, and those that write out from experiences, felt emotions and the fact that they might quite possibly be gay themselves.

When I write I often put myself in place of the focus character's place, and of course most of it is the attraction and 'what if' of what Kisame and Itachi being together - I think they would be a ready match despite all the 'ZOMG BOYS KISSING' ideas. TKisame and Itachi are partners, and I've experienced the same feelings of having a working partner that had to be that close to me. It was only natural for myself to have feelings, although not acting upon them, develop for him. This is just a reflection of my own experiences and feelings.

On that note, feel free to leave comments, but if you don't have anything supportive or helpful to say, don't insult people by posting something ignorant and hurtful.
Reply
:icontobirules123:
tobirules123 Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2008  Student General Artist
wow nice job!!! i can tOTALLy imagine the way the eat and stuffs XD
Reply
:iconx1xmycrimsontearsx1x:
x1xMyCrimsonTearsx1x Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2008   Photographer
...XD lmao. It was UBER cute and hilarious. Especially the "no one in thief right minds gets turned on be watching someone eat" comment!!! LOL!!!
Reply
:iconkianna-is-my-name:
Kianna-is-my-name Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2008
that was disturbing although i could see it happening! but any way...i liked it. very disturbing yet lovable.
Reply
:iconitachikisamelover101:
itachikisamelover101 Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2008
this is one of my favs yah koolzies
Reply
:iconanime-angel-2:
Anime-Angel-2 Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2008
this was cute!! and..AWWWWW!!!! little Kisame's!!!
Reply
:iconitachikisamelover101:
itachikisamelover101 Featured By Owner Jun 15, 2008
i really like this ive read a few time its good but strange
Reply
:icondemonizdkyo1369:
DemonizdKyo1369 Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2008
I find ur story.... very sexy i loves Kisame
Reply
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